What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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