hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
