He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
