remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize