Don't you send me to vm
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
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