never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
