Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
