i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
if i can run in heels then i can drive
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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