Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize