thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
