I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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