no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
it's like iHOP with fire
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
