He is an equal opportunity slut.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize