i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.