i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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