Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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