I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
