another moral hangover. fuck.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
