i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
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