"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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