The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
