she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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