Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Hippo gnu deer
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
