I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Randomize