My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
