I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
