the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize