I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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