So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me that man meat
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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