I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize