Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
being pregnant is like rehab
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
