he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize
