....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
