the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
