Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
