i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
