Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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