The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
My life is pants optional.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize