He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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