so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
we should paint friendship bongs
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