My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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