tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
try to milk me bitch
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
