if you like me you must not know who I am
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Randomize
