he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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