is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize