He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize