ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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