Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Drunk is a universal language darling
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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