that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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