Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
